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The Burga Baby
Yossi Alfi
Translated from the Hebrew by Evan Fallenberg
My mother moaned with labor pains for three days. At every
opportunity she would recount the story of those pains to me, saying, “Ay,
Yosef…with you it was the most difficult, abdallak. It took so long for
you to come out
She lay in the room at the top of the stairway that was known as the tarar,
where the breeze from the roof met the coolness of the house as it rose from the
cellar. Mosquito netting hung over her to protect her from all manner of pests,
and a mat was spread beneath her to support her back. The Christian midwife’s
name was Atisha; it was Atisha who was called upon to birth the ‘pampered ones’
from among the young Jewish women. She was a certified midwife, and so
knowledgeable that all the other women in confinement were jealous of those
assisted by her.
Mother told me of ancient woes,
Among them, me!
A yellowing mat
A Christian midwife.
Lengthy days.
I was supposed to be born
But was apparently not interested.
I could have been born in Israel
Thus avoiding yet another complex.
But for whatever reason,
When my mother wished to cross the border
With me in her belly,
I wished to be born in Iraq
And I reminded her she was – pregnant.
With me
Inside her.
Thus it was, a worn mat.
I was born Yosef
I was given life
I said Shalom
And no one answered.
I was born.
Then the Christian midwife, Atisha, said, “Subhan Allah,” May God be
blessed. And my mother was taken aback. “What happened?” she asked. “What
happened? Is the child all right?”
“Not only he is fine, he is special, a special child!” Atisha cried out, her
bellowing voice an immediate summons to the first row of women positioned just
outside the netting, among them my older sisters, who had provided assistance to
the midwife throughout the birth. Behind them stood the expectant aunts, and
behind them, my father entered the tarar in a rush, his face pale with
fear and worry.
“A special child has been born to you, with Allah’s help and that of the
prophets. Women, ululate!”
“What? What’s happened?” my father responded with a parched tongue, on the verge
of fainting on the midwife Atisha’s bosom.
“The boy has been born with a burga,” Atisha exclaimed from between
pursed lips.
“A burga?” my father asked, gathering the pieces of himself that had
shattered in every direction: the frightened piece, the astonished piece, the
blessed piece, the sanctified piece, the honored piece, the curious piece…
“A burga? I’ve never seen a child with a burga,” my father said as
he approached my mother, who was holding the baby in her arms. The baby’s face
was still covered with the caul that was attached at the corners of his
forehead, two breathing holes open beneath the nose. My father took a look and
once again nearly fainted. The midwife held him up and seated him on the low
stool that had until only a moment earlier been supporting her. He sat down,
wiping the sweat from his broad brow. He thrust his fingers into his mouth and
bit them like a babe seeking a pacifier. He muttered, “Burga, burga, we
have a child with a burga…”
Throughout my life I had been searching for the proper Hebrew word for a
burga but had come up with only an approximation. Then one day I was reading
a book in which the author told of being born with a burga, which he
translated to English using the word ‘caul’ – and I learned that this term was a
familiar one, and the matter well known.
Not much time passed before the early-rising synagogue congregants received the
news of my burga-birth, and the rabbi was led with great ceremony to our
house, where he ascended the stairs in the direction of the tarar. The
room was now filled with all the members of the household, who had been awakened
by my sisters’ ululating cries, the gurgling praises made by the tongue at the
top of the open pharynx.
The house contained a number of families, since we lived, as was the custom in
those days, in a large home as one extended family – the uncle with his family,
the aunt with hers, the grandmothers.
“A child born with a burga is not just special; he is one who heralds the
coming of the Messiah,” said the rabbi quietly, privately, to my father, his
pleasant words fluttering from his beard to my father’s ears. The midwife
hastened to remove the caul from the baby’s face, my face, tugging lightly at
the corners of my forehead and gently tearing it. She folded it and placed it in
the embroidered kerchief that had been on my mother’s head through the long
hours of the birth, and she placed it in the hands of the rabbi.
The rabbi opened the kerchief and gazed at the thin caul, then passed it to my
father, who handled it with much anxiety, as though it were a precious diamond
that might fall from his hands. The kerchief was then passed among the men, then
the women, and the rabbi said, “It must not be touched, must not be touched,
this is God’s handiwork, it must not be touched,” and the eyes of one and all at
the top of the stairs were peeled wide, their necks stretched forward, in order
to catch sight of the contents of the kerchief.
“Burga.”
“Burga.”
“Burga.”
The burga, which was a part of my body, from fetus to
the birth that had taken place only moments earlier, became public property and
was brought ceremoniously to the synagogue for the morning prayers, and there
the folded burga was placed inside a lump of silver that was then smelted
closed and turned into an amulet.
I was raised on this story, a blond child from Basra about whom all who
approached were warned: “Take care with that little ‘Englishman’; he was born
with a caul.” ‘English’ because of my blondness and the caul because of its
holiness.
Right after reading about the term ‘caul’ I went online, and it turned out that
this phenomenon is well known and that babies – one per several hundred thousand
– are born with them. There are people – not just in Iraq where I happened to be
born, but in other places like Europe and the rest of the world – who perceive
cauls to be a symbol of holiness, and there are people who take part in caul
cults for preserving cauls and sanctifying their lives through them in one way
or another. I even saw dried cauls – go figure…
I remember, in my early childhood in Iraq, when I was three years old, and later
in Israel, that people would come to me for a blessing. I would place my tiny
hand on the person’s head and say ‘Bah-bah-bah’ just as I saw my father do when
he would bless me with the verse “May God give you of the dew of heaven and the
fatness of the earth…”
Most surprising of all was that they, the adults, would come to me in awe and
reverence and my mother would ask me – always humorously, with laughter, so that
“the child will not be startled, abdallak,” to bless them, and she would
take my hand and place it on the person’s forehead. In Israel, where I had
already been living for more than a year with my grandmother but without the
rest of the family, people would come to our tent in the transit camp for new
immigrants and declare to my grandmother: “Is this the boy with the caul? Tell
him to bless me!” and my grandmother would stroke my hand and place it on the
head of the supplicant and tell me to say ‘Bah-bah-bah,’ and I would hasten to
do as she told me. Once I had grown older and become Israeli in every way, “and
not as we expected him to be,” as my uncles would say, they would remind me: “Do
you remember how you would bless us with ‘Bah-bah-bah?’”
That is the story with which I grew up: the boy born with a caul, a burga.
I know that word, burga, since it has been with me my whole life, so
often repeated. “What are you talking about? Do you know who this boy is? He’s
the one born with a burga.” I fought it, always; from the time I was a
child, then a youth, an adolescent, an adult, I fought against such
superstitions. Till this very day there are old people still alive who give me
that look – do you remember that you used to do ‘Bah-bah-bah’ for me? I would
bless them. It is now a kind of a joke, but for them it was a serious matter.
For me, I was certain it was some sort of child’s play.
The burga became an amulet that my mother wore her entire life on a chain
around her neck and used to heal one thing or another. She told me that when my
father was in the throes of death and in terrible pain she placed the burga
on his chest and it calmed him. In other cases of using the burga I
employed my powers of logic to fight all those concepts and I ran away from all
those old-time beliefs, seeking new answers in the Israeliness I had created as
a means of protecting myself from my past.
Mother fell ill and suffered excruciating pain from cancer and other maladies.
In our tradition, there is no such thing as sending a parent to an old age home,
so my mother lived on at home though she spent a lot of time at my sister’s
house. One night the heavy amulet that was always hanging around her neck was
apparently keeping her from breathing easily, so she slipped it off and laid it
on the headboard. The amulet fell behind the bed where no one could see it and
even she did not notice its absence although she had worn it her entire adult
life, had made aliyah to Israel with it after many hardships and lived with it
for years upon years, from a tent in an immigrant camp to homes in Petah Tikva
and Ramat Gan.
When she died a number of years ago, everyone went looking for the amulet,
though no one ever mentioned it to me. Then recently my sister moved apartments,
and one Friday evening she told me, “Yossi, listen. We found something that
belongs to you. I have to return it to you. Just don’t get upset about it.”
She gave me this thing wrapped in an old cloth of Iraqi linen that had been
specially tailored to fit the heavy amulet. I looked at it and told her, “I
recognize this…this is what Mother would wear hanging…it’s…”
My sister said, “It’s your burga.” And the burga took me, a man in
his fifties, straight back to childhood. At that time I had been unaware that my
mother had been wearing it all the time; I had thought it was hidden somewhere.
I knew they had used it in the synagogue, that it was brought to sick people and
placed on their bodies. Before my uncle died, my mother took my father aside and
told him, “Put the burga on him and he will be at peace.” They put it on
him and he passed away tranquilly.
My sister placed the wrapped burga in my hand. I sniffed it, and
it had my mother’s scent, a delicate soap smell, the smell of a pampered
daughter of rich parents, the smell I grew up with as a shoot, a bud, a flower
of a brand-new Israeli life. That scent of my mother lives on and is preserved
in this burga, and I simply burst into terrible sobs that I could not
contain inside me, the sobs of a child separated from his caul, which has
returned and now seeks a place in his life.
So shocked and dismayed were they that my sister, my son, my daughter and the
family members who were hosting us did not know what to do with themselves. “I’m
sorry, perhaps I shouldn’t have given this to you…” my sister mumbled.
“No, no, no,” I said. “It’s good that you gave this to me and I’ll save it. I
really did wonder what had happened to it.”
I placed the amulet in my wife’s hands, and she tucked it inside a velvet bag
and put that into a safe, where it remains until today.
I do not know why I am telling this story that I have never told before, but
this is yet another birth, another separation from knowing myself. A different
self to an individuality that I will apparently never understand among all the
screens and masks I have used to cover my face and my personality.
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